You know the score by now – let’s rank all 22 UK number one hits of 2003.

22. Loneliness – Tomcraft (1)

I’ll admit this kind of dance/electronic stuff isn’t my forte so for all I know this is an absolutely timeless piece that doesn’t deserve such slander…but…it’s really not all that good. I have zero recollection of it from 2003, but then again, I also have zero recollection of it from three minutes ago when I last heard it – dull. 

21. Breathe – Blu Cantrell feat. Sean Paul (4)

This is just trash, how it managed four weeks at the top is beyond me. 

20. Changes – Ozzy and Kelly Osbourne (1)

This was a bizarre father and daughter version of Ozzy’s Black Sabbath song Changes. The only other father daughter duo to top the UK charts was Frank and Nancy Sinatra with Something Stupid in 1967 (a pretty…odd father/daughter duet but at least Nancy has a sense of humour, saying “…some people call [it] the Incest Song, which I think is, well, very sweet!”)

19. Be Faithful – Fatman Scoop feat. Crooklyn Clan (2)

This is one of those songs that you would never intentionally listen to (it’s barely music, it’s more hype) but when you do happen to hear it you might end up singing along to it or find yourself getting into the groove. More impressive are the names of the artists involved.

18. Mad World – Michael Andrews and Gary Jules (1)

This was a reworking of Tears for Fears’ 1982 hit Mad World and was used on the Donnie Darko soundtrack. Unlike the synth heavy, typical 80s vibe of the original, we get a stripped back, whiney, and frankly depressing version which ended up Christmas No 1. Bleak. You’ll probably best remember it as the song your dad told you ‘wasn’t as good as the original’.

17. Spirit in the Sky – Gareth Gates feat. The Kumars (2)

Spirit in the Sky has been covered ad nauseum – this Gareth Gates version was recorded for Comic Relief so it gets some leeway for being charitable. It features ‘comedic’ ad libs from the cast of The Kumars at No. 42, a UK sitcom that ran for several years and at its peak in 2003. It’s an upbeat cover including every cliché imaginable from a gospel choir to a dramatic key change. Nobody’s going to rush to dig out their old copy.

16. Beautiful – Christina Aguilera (2)

This is a song that probably ranks higher on most people’s list but I’ve never been a huge fan. It’s all a bit saccharine for me. But I guess it’s empowering? (And admittedly, I sang along like a diva whilst doing my relistens).

15. Never Gonna Leave Your Side – Daniel Bedingfield (1)

Not a patch on If You’re Not the One

14. Ignition (Remix) – R. Kelly (5)

We know the rule here – we separate the art from the artist – so here’s the obligatory f*ck you to R Kelly and let’s just look at the song. I hadn’t listened to the whole of Ignition in years and I’ll be honest, I was a touch underwhelmed – the chorus does all the heavy lifting on this track and because of that it can only really hit the middle of this list. 

13. Are You Ready for Love – Elton John (1)

Lord this song is cheesy. A rerelease of Elton’s 1977 modest hit (no. 42) this is really just a case of good marketing from Elton’s team. The song reached the top of the charts after it was used in an ad for the 2003-04 football season. It’s not really very 2003 but an enjoyable enough track.

12. Crashed the Wedding – Busted (1)

I like this song, it’s a fun pop-rock track that was Busted’s bread and butter. That said, I feel like it doesn’t have as much punch as some of their other tracks, and compared to other No 1s released this year, its going to struggle to climb much higher.

11. Mandy – Westlife (1)

Westlife know how to do schmaltzy ballads and this cover (of a cover, of a cover, of a cover – honestly everyone wants to cover Mandy) is classic Westlife. It’s not their best but does the job.

10. Stop Living the Lie – David Sneddon (2)

Remember this? What a blast from the past! David Sneddon won the first series of Fame Academy (underrated show) and released this ballad four months after winning the show. Sneddon was never really about the pop star life and soon turned his focus to his passion – song writing. Since 2003 he’s written pop songs for artists including Nicole Scherzinger, Lana Del Ray, Will Young and Olly Murs. His own No 1 is actually a pretty decent ballad. 

9. You Said No – Busted (1)

This Busted song is probably less remembered than the likes of Year 3000 and What I Go to School For but it actually charted the higher than both. It’s a typical pop punk (punk definitely in lowercase) song with juvenile lyrics, crunchy guitars and a middle eight filled with ‘na na nas’. Classic. 

8. Bring Me to Live – Evanesence (4)

2003 is a great year because songs classed as ‘nu metal’ and ‘rap rock’ make it to the top of the charts. Full disclosure I thought this song was called ‘Wake Me Up’ and I’d wager I’m not the only one. Their follow-up hit My Immortal doesn’t quite resonate the same way, meaning, from a mainstream POV, Bring Me to Life is basically a one-hit-wonder.

7. Hole in the Head – Sugababes (1)

This deserved longer at the top. Sugababes teamed up with Brian Higgins and Miranda Cooper of Xenomania for their second No 1 produced by the pair (the first being Round Round in 2002) – and it still holds up today.

6. Slow – Kylie Minogue (1)

You can count on Kylie to pop up every few years with a new album (she was already releasing her ninth
back in 2003!) and a banging lead single to remind us that camp, synthpop never really died. Slow is sultry, electric and camp – it’s great and the kind of pop that never goes out of style. 

5. Make Luv – Room 5 feat. Oliver Cheatham (4)

Italian producer Room 5 sampled Oliver Cheatham’s 1983 hit Get Down Saturday Night to create the ICONIC club bop Make Luv. It was initially released in 2001 but re-entered the charts in 2003 at No 1. The music video is EVERYTHING. 

4. All the Things She Said – t.A.T.u (4)

A needlessly ‘controversial’ song (surprise, surprise people didn’t like lesbian theme…sigh) that is so undeniably early 2000s. t.A.T.u were a Russian duo who secured several No 1s across the globe with this one-hit-wonder. The music video also stirred up some criticism given they spend most of it making out with each other.

3. Crazy in Love – Beyonce feat. Jay-Z (3)

Released before Beyonce really became Beyonce this song really is iconic: from the ear-worm horn section (a sample of the Chi-Lites’ 1970 song Are You My Woman (Tell Me So)) the uh-ohs and the infectious chorus – this song still sounds as fresh today as it did in 03.

2. Where is the Love – Black Eyed Peas (6)

Biggest selling single of 2003 baby. A bit cliché to stick this so high but it really is a good song and one that launched the Peas into the mainstream (aka sell outs as some OG fans claimed). This was the first single to feature Fergie as a member of the band and was initially written as a post 9/11 anxiety track. It evolved to address more issues from terrorism and gang crime to racism and the general hypocrisy of the US government…I guess a rerelease could be on the cards then.

1. Leave Right Now – Will Young (2)

I don’t care if Black Eyed Peas had the biggest selling single of 2003, Leave Right Now is the BEST No 1 of 2003. It was the soundtrack of Britain in the early 00s, something about it is so nostalgic of the era (think Dido, Jamelia, Gabrielle, Robbie). Not only is it nostalgic, it’s also a great song – catchy but not irritating, lyrical but not pretentious. This was the song that really proved that Will Young was the worthy Pop Idol winner (no offense to Gareth Gates but prancing around with the Kumars doesn’t exactly scream legacy). The song won an Ivor Novello Award and has been included in countless ‘best’ lists (including this one – what a win) and perhaps best of all is the music video, a first-person POV with no cuts set in an art gallery featuring a fight – top tier stuff.

Second the Best

Some big No 2s this year. Dido’s White Flag, Busted’s Year 3000 (how did Crashed the Wedding hit the top but not this?!), JT’s Cry Me a River. Some big covers too – Girls Aloud’s Jump which was featured in Love Actually and DJ Sammy’s Boys of Summer (low-key iconic) both made it to No 2. There was also Sweet Dreams my LA Ex by S Club’s Rachel Stevens which had no business being anywhere near the top of the charts. 

Across the Pond

Hip Hop has always had more of an impact in the states and 50 Cent’s In Da Club was the biggest selling single of the year. In the UK it was still a success, reaching number three in the charts but didn’t come anywhere near as big as it was in America.

The Hit that Got Away

To be fair, most of the hits this year actually did chart highly. Eminem’s Lose Yourself goes down in history as one of the best rap tracks out there (No 3) and Jamelia’s Superstar was a smash (also No 3.) Hear me out on this: Bring It On (No 5) by another Fame Academy graduate, Alistair Griffin – it manages to both be a fun, original song and sound like it’s sampled Wheatus’ Teenage Dirtbag and Torn by Natalie Imbruglia.